Been spending lots of time at Sara’s so Stv can do his laundry. She doesn’t mind, she loves the company. At least we keep an eye on the kids and she can breath in- breath out and do other things… Barbie is really fond of Stv because it seems that he is the only one that plays with her and Diego. I don’t get it… So many toys laying all around the house, no order in their lives, mom too busy with all chores and work, and dad always absent. I wonder how that will improve Diego’s condition, or keep Barbie sane. Whatever… Seems I am learning all the “what not to let your kids do, what you should not do as a parent and what not to allow in your home”. Two dogs and two cats inside a very small house that shelters two brats and a cromagnon is not right. Puppy is blind and almost deaf, and has ticks and fleas all over. Oliver is a stink with feet. The cats are allright… although flea bags. And they all end up in the kids beds… (sight) I honestly don’t know how the kids are not too sick because the animals are not so homebound, they go outside and then come in… a big ewwww… The one rule of the house: Only the strongest survive. I know Sara has many things to do, her husband is not the brightest and doesn’t help at all… But she lets the kids rule, do as they want, and so that’s where trouble starts… Whatever. I know nothing of kids, I’m not a mother.

Gave one of my armoires to Stv so he have a place to put his clean clothing… Still they have not connected water on the apartment and so no cleanup of the place has taken place… No need to mention the bathroom. It’s all a big EWWW. Well, also gave him a chair so his desk has an use. And a gas lamp, so he can read if he has to. No light either, and it is not likely that light can be connected because the last person to live there left a bill of some hundreds. Whatever. He’s got to see if he can get cupones. But he needs a light or water bill from the place he is living and there is none, the owners have none… Interesting, huh? Anyway he will check tomorrow. He lives alone, no water, no light, rented place and studying… shoot him if they say no to him, damnit! They are supposed to give him an emergency check… That’s what I’ve been told. Let’s see that outcome… Ananska gave Stv a nice speech on his attitude. Yay! We went for medicines, and he got that. Beautiful. He’s gotta see it’s not just me who says his attitude stinks. He needs to take charge and stop being negative and mopy about all. If given lemons, make lemonade… but being grouchy 24/7, unpolite and careless and sad and depressed is not going to help. About time someone else but me told him. He needs major adjustments. This week he has 3 tests. Let’s see how he copes…

Tril and his lovely calls. Last week he was mad because I did not went to the dining out… Erm… He never called, and I left my phone in his house and through email. I did my part. If he is lame that is not my problem. Then called me up yesterday, at first nagging why I did not answer him on Sun… Because you know, I must be like everyone else and carry the cel at my side 24/7. Hmm… Then if I wanted to dine… at 5:45, when everyone knows that I dine at 5:00. Then about going to the movies… like there is something to see… Then asking if I was alone. Followed by the expression “Que raro”, and the “I’ll call tomorrow, bye”. Not even a full minute. After a full week of silence. Yup, that is him, missing me lots, loving me lots, but finding less than a minute per week to talk to me. And I am supposed to be grateful, thrilled, enthralled, ecstatic about his picking up a phone and calling… Because he is soooo thoughtful… Right.

The big ball of shit that keeps growing bigger and bigger and bigger… That is my so-called sentimental life. Big Shit. And stinks like fish. At least I am not crying anymore. In the middle of every crisis, seems that I stopped caring. Been annoyed by everything and just having a titanic slogan that pleads to everyone “Just leave me alone”. I am tired and drained. I wish that a good guy that would share everything will appear in my life, but good guys are either taken, or wandering the deserts, or dead. Try finding someone whom you can trust not to be unfaithful, not to want to take advantage of who you are and what you do, not to want to control you or own you… Advertising and music has brainwashed everyone into thinking that all you need in life is a good fuck, beer and then more fuck. Followed by money and fame. All the while being brainless bastards who look cool and act stupid. I’m sorry, but I can’t live up to those expectations because there is more to life. Places to discover, things to learn, goals to achieve… I cannot stand the little minds of people within this isle. And I resent being treated as an oddity. And I hate that just because I have a brain and won’t be a bimbo I just cannot find the man of my dreams.

Whatever. Next!

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