Reality Bites

My life is like a sitcom that I do not watch but live. I know fast is better in my case, but everything moves fast and yet in the end here I am... Little old me, with my issues of glory and fall. What to do? Reflecting on my youth and childhood has been of no help. I still feel as the ugly duckling that I was then... People always make a point of making you feel your worst. Suck it up, stand bravely facing the enemy... Inside I am broken, and feel that no matter how much I try, no matter how much I accomplish, I will always be the one laughed at... in every situation...

I wish for once to have the charms to make anyone say something beautiful to me... just once. But that is wishful thinking. I wish I could feel I am a complete woman in every sense, but eah passing day I feel worst... Women make comments out of gossip and hatred, and men talk to me as if I were one of them, everywhere. No matter how much I try to make them understand I am a lady, believe it or not, noone reacts to that. So I am Lady Cellophane... Pass right through me, you'll never know I'm there... Of what use is a brain and a heart, when todays society burns at the stake anyone who is not by its standards?

If I need to be an anorexic bitch to get attention, I'll never get attention. I dont have a problem with my looks, everyone else does. And I really dont care, but it bugs a lot, both at proffessional and personal levels. Seems I dont get what I want because my wrapping is not what is acepted as appealing in this cursed society. I know... I have the grace of a rhino, the charm of a hag and the loveliness of a frog. I'm screwed for life... And this knowledge doesnt help my overall feelings about LIFE in general.

Whatever. Seems I am my only greatest fan, and that should do. My sadness remains... But I guess I am used to it by now. And still, I wish for love...

I'm over it
You see I'm falling in the vast abyss
Clouded by memories of the past
At last I see

I hear it fading, I can't speak it
Or else you will dig my grave
You feel them finding, always whining
Take my hand now be alive

You see I cannot be forsaken
Because I'm not the only one
We walk amongst you feeding, raping
Must we hide from everyone?

I'm over it
Why can't we be together embrace it?
Sleeping so long taking off the mask
At last I see

My fear is fading, I can't speak it
Or else you will dig my grave
You feel them finding, always whining
Take my hand now be alive

You see I cannot be forsaken
Because I'm not the only one
We walk amongst you feeding, raping
Must we hide from everyone?

You see I cannot be forsaken
Because I'm not the only one
We walk amongst you feeding, raping
Must we hide from everyone?

Everyone
Everyone

-David Draiman of Disturbed, Forsaken